Seven Days While My Wife Was Away--Day Seven

What would Patsy Juggs do?

Eric Nopanen @ unsplash.com

On the day Maddie was coming home, I thought about what Patsy Juggs would do. Patsy was my newly-found stripper Jesus, my savior.

She gave me her number at the club yesterday and said if there was anything I needed, give her a buzz.

So I called her.

“Patsy, I need your help. I’m having an anxiety attack. My wife will be home in a few hours, and I don’t know how to explain the wreckage in the kitchen.”

In less than thirty minutes, Patsy Juggs was at my door in all her sleazy glory. I didn’t care what my bible-thumping neighbors thought—I needed my Stripper Guru.